Sorry, Not Sorry ...

Obviously I never made it back to finish the post yesterday. I did go in for the paracentesis and  liters were drained. I had a Zoom meeting scheduled for 2pm with my Group Lead of my IOP - a personal session each week to see how I am doing overall with everything. We had agree to move it to noon, so I was a bit rushed getting home in time. Things took longer at the hospital because of the amount drained, I had to receive an extra dose of albumin I had not time-factored into the day (about - minutes). So I made my meeting with about 10 minutes to spare.

Tuesday was such a great day for me. Dropped the car off to have the safety recall fixed on it. Something about a sensor in the passenger seat that improperly detects someone sitting there or not when an airbag is deployed. While that was being done, RM picked me up and we went back to her place. I set up my laptop and did my 3-hour IOP, then RM and I went to get my vehicle, followed up with lunch at Red Robin.

All I can say is ... wow. We ended sitting there and chatting after lunch until nearly 3:30pm, and it was such a great conversation! I felt I shared too much about things going on in my life, but I felt I needed to. I usually keep things so close to my chest until after, and on my way home, I realized that RM had also opened up and shared a lot with me about how things are in her life. I don't think we have been so open with each other before and shared so much. It was ... just fantastic! Oh, and the endless side salads were good, too. RM sent me home with a pint of her salsa for the Youngest (which only has about a third in it now) and had even made a quart of chunky for me (which is now gone).

I arrived home and saw that mail had come so I grabbed it. On top of everything is a check. You know how you can tell a Government check - their style of check peeking behind my address. I got excited! I rushed back to mt desk, and the second piece of mail was from SS Disability. I opened that one first to find I have been approved! The check that had come, well, it was for "backpay" from March to current. So an unexpected bonus ... and the amount I am to receive each month is higher than I was at least hoping for! So now I have some income coming in to help with all the medical. I hope to have all my balances current and at/near a zero balance in the next few months. At least right now I can address the ones that are overdue.

That evening, since I had no meetings at the VFW this Tuesday, I attended my TG group, and had a good discussion on 'Have you ever felt in control enough that you didn't need AA'. When my turn came up, I shared that I could NOT do it without AA. Though I went 5 months sober without any additional learning of the program, or the IOP, but I don't think I could stand here and honestly say I could have relapsed at anytime, and now that I am in the program, just the support keeps me going, let alone working on the steps.

Tuesday was awesome! So yesterday, I was in very good spirits when I had my one on one, and shared why. There's a nice big chunk of mental stress and worry off my mind now that the disability is coming in.

Today? Hmmmm. I have my IOP this morning, and nothing planned for the day. I may go get my hair cut, as the sides and back are getting shaggy. I know tomorrow after IOP the Youngest and I are headed to Discount Grocery to get drink, snacks, and any other good deals we find. No major weekend plans. We were invited to a "pool party" for one of the Post members who I consider a good acquaintance, but have not decided if I will go. I am sure the Wife won't go, but I am going to try to get her mind changed, at least to go for a little bit. I want her around more of the people I know and like/trust. Saga to be continued....

And with that, I need to get on with my day. My numbers are good this morning, and I am feeling better with the abdominal pressure off. I think I'll have some tuna salad for lunch today.

PeacE

Busy Tuesday

 Today I have done nothing pretty much except sit on my butt in my office chair at the computer. But it is a productive butt-sitting!!

Had my IOP session from 9-12, and it went fine. Then I decided I needed to clear clutter from my desk, and see what it all is. I grabbed an accordion file from our "supply" cabinet, and got to work. Most of it is medical bills, EOBs, and miscellaneous medical. So I grouped mine together, transferred notes from the envelope of when I last paid, amount, etc. onto the bill (showing which ones are PIF). Then it was the medical EOBs, then Dental EOBs. We had transferred my medical from 2025 to a card through Banner. and it has it's own section. So now easier to locate if needed for taxes next year. I added in some extra stuff I had in the clutter: my IRA, my Stock Ownership from Spencer's, and Property Tax/Valuation notices. As I went through them, there were a couple that were ready to pay (Insurance already had) and I paid them off, or got on a short-term payment plan.

I completed our taxes. I tried Itemized (with all that medical) and filled in what I could based on what information I had (Property Tax, Charitable Donations, etc.). Did a comparison between Itemized and Standard, and my Itemization was way less than the given standard, so went Standard. We are getting some money back from Fed and State, as we should with all the medical that went on just for me last year alone. I'll go over the figures with the Wife tonight and eFile tomorrow.

I updated my Google Calendar with more appointments/meetings. Still nothing but two appointments with Mayo in May are my next ones. One is a video call, the other in person. Added in my IOP sessions, IOP Personal sessions, and One-on-one sessions. Cancelled the Paracentesis for tomorrow - I feel pretty good - no sloshing, no pressure. I do feel a small build up of fluid, but should easily go to next week for sure. I also scheduled a Para for 4/29. 

Youngest has the Caretaker video meeting tomorrow morning. I'll probably sit in on it, just to hear what they go over. Most will be the importance of their caregiving, and into my after-care, I am sure.

Today all I have left is a meeting at the Post. I did the Agenda and sent it out yesterday.

So, productive day? Even though I sat on my butt, I feel much got done, organized, and/or paid. That's counts as I see it. I see a bowl of ice cream as an award.

PeacE

'Never Too Old To Learn' ...

 ... it's what "they" say. I don't know who "they" is, but I do know I have had to learn quite a bit of new things, out of my comfort zone, in just the last handful of years. When I was doing data breaches, it was ways to learn how to use excel better, to parse out information that is clumped together, and other things, like getting proper format for SSN, or zip codes, etc. Very few formulas involved - most were just tools in the program, but I had never been taught excel, and was learning as I went. I have used the program, but most times it was only replacing information in one spot, to print out another tab for like inventory labels. I didn't have to create anything. I know RM has mentioned many, many times about her reluctance to HAVE to learn something new. I think in her case, it was dealing with how to use PowerPoint and creating slides, etc. She had never had to do it before, so why now? But, in the end, it seems we end up learning something new.

My tale gets a little boggling from there.

A couple days ago, I knew I needed to get some sort of order with the medical bills and payments. I hadn't filed taxes yet, and thought with the major costs from September through year-end, maybe it would be worth filing for the medical. So I had a pad of ledger sheets (literally, like from the '70s - it is colored from age) and I started with what paper bills/receipts I had handy. Normally throughout the year, I just pay online to my PCP, and I don't keep receipts for the prescriptions (as a rule) and then there was the slew of email receipts, balance dues, etc. I don't see a dentist regularly, and so I have no dental this last year. Wife does, but she didn't save her receipts, as we don't usually spend enough in medical to even consider using it. I guess with us getting older, we need to do better. So, I'm slogging away, mostly through emails showing payments made. Trying to guess DOS is near impossible. I have hardly gotten any EOBs to match up to any kind of DOS. My notes and columns on this ledger sheet were just all over the place. I got frustrated. What could be a better way?

Excel. This is one example of what the program was created to do, but one small problem. I don't know how to create the type of document I want, with formulas to do a running total, and a final total, headers, note areas... I know I am not going to sit through hours of searching on Google "In Excel how to ...".

A couple, maybe three, years ago I had purchased a volume on how to use Excel. It is called " Excel 2019 Bible The Comprehensive Tutorial Source" but this book was $35 of door stop. It's almost two inches thick but the content is so far over my head... This book is for the advanced, advanced user. I'm talking pivot tables, and more. It never helped me out at all. So I am leery about these 'help books'. But I found myself on Barnes&Noble.com looking at what is out there, and trying from a description of the book only, to determine if it truly is going to have what I need. That, is basically a walk-thru from newbie, then to regular user. I found something that might work for what I need. I thought, well, since I am at it, I could use the similar in Word, with all my minutes and agendas, plus policies, it could be handy to know how to do more than orient center, left, right, and underline, Italics, bold. 

The books came Friday. For $38 I got two books to teach me something new. Update maybe later  this week.

Wow, that was some drivel to work through, huh?!? It's Saturday night (actually early Sunday) and I am awake again. Edibles don't seem to be helping me get relaxed to sleep like before. Today I was foggy-minded again, and it just made things irritating. I had gone up to the Post tonight for a Celebration of Life. I noticed a couple times in conversation, I'd lose my thoughts. Often the one I notice is starting to do something, and forgetting what it was. Then I spend five minutes trying to recreate what I was doing for the thought to pop in my head again. Doesn't always work. The Wife makes fun of me when I am like this, when we are talking. I will pause and start searching my head for the word I wanted, and so I start saying things related towards what I am thinking, and eventually it comes to me. But she just giggles at me as I struggle to find the word. She knows if she were to jump in offering up words it would just frustrate and anger me. 

So the mind fog issue is a bother right now. That was the purpose of the two new prescriptions I got last month - to kill this ammonia-creating bacteria and help clear the ammonia from my system. But, as I know I said in a previous post, it's now been two weeks without one of them (the main bacteria killer from what I understand). Last week a gal from the Liver Dr.'s office called about this prescription. She was having issues with the insurance. I think I covered this previously... either way, she calls me up on Friday late afternoon, to ask me if I ever got an answer from my insurance about the issue. I explained to her I left her a voicemail last week, and I also messaged the information to the office through the patient portal. She hadn't done anything this whole last week!! Says she is going to try some other pharmacy, but I have no clue what the heck she is doing. Ins. said submit the 'scrip to the pharmacy, they will contact insurance. Sigh. More time without medication that is supposed to be helping me get better...

Speaking of getting better ... damn it, I just lost that thought. Give me a minute. Okay, so all these paracentesis procedures I get done (once a week so far this year) I found out that my doctors orders are for therapeutic purpose (for my comfort) but if more than 5 liters are drained, I am to receive a treatment of albumin, which I have NEVER received through one of my scheduled appointments. The only time I received it, was when I would go through the ER, because they saw the doctor's orders. So, albumin:

Albumin keeps the fluid part of your blood from leaking out of your blood vessels (the tubes your blood flows through) and into other tissues. If you don't have enough albumin, fluid can leak out of your blood and build up in your lungs, abdomen (belly), or other parts of your body. Albumin also helps carry important substances throughout your body. These include hormones, vitamins, and enzymes (proteins that speed up certain chemical reactions in your body).

So last week when scheduling called (again to verify all my info - really) I asked about the albumin. She confirmed it was in the orders, so I thought fine. I asked her to make sure it is noted to have that treatment ready for me. Monday: no albumin treatment. In fact, when I asked, I was told it had a not to NOT give an albumin treatment. <facepalm>. Scheduling called yesterday (for Monday's appointment) and we did the verification of info dance, we tangoed about what is my responsibility to pay as my deductible is surely met, and by my calculation, my out of pocket is almost maxed as well. Anyways, I forgot to ask about the albumin, so will need to do it when I go in Monday morning. If I can't get it this week, and the ruckus I may need to raise about a hospital being unable to follow a doctor's orders, doesn't get them to give me one, I'm going to be angry. Hope for the best D00d....

Well, my fingers are starting to cramp up again. I am getting tired of cramps all over as well. I used to drink pickle brine, and it actually works! But the doc has me on a low (or no) sodium diet. But I still drink some every now and then.

PeacE

Just Die Already

Yesterday I talked about the Damn Cat and his issue. I guess it would be lack of issue, since he was blocked up and couldn't pee. Either way, later in the morning I felt sort of bad. Here I was talking about just putting him down, as it is the cheaper alternative, then I herd news that yet another friend of mine had passed away. I know, it seems weird that a guy my age has had so many friends pass away over the past two years. Weirder yet, that all my friends are older than me. I guess I don't like people my own age ... I don't know. So yesterday pretty much had me bummed out most of the day.

This morning had us doing a follow-up shot at the vet for Rusty. This shot is supposed to help something like making him produce fluids and help breakdown the crystals that are in his system. At $51, I told the vet (or rather the receptionist, as the vet didn't come out to talk to me) this was his first, and last shot. The vet wants him to do another 3-4 days of these shots, but I flat out told them fuck no. We've already spent (now) damn near $800 on a fucking pet I don't want, so why would I spend another $200+ on the fucking thing?!? The vet said it was our decision, but Rusty may develop the same situation again.

I love how they use the pet's name, making it sound like a human, and that we cannot neglect their health and welfare. But I looked the receptionist in the eye and told her I could have saved $700 if I had just put the fucker down in the first place. Needless to say, I don't think I am a favorite owner of a patient now.

I called the Wife to tell her what I thought about the whole cost vs need situation. She got all quiet on the phone, meaning she didn't agree with me. I plainly said that I am not running the cat to a vet to spend more money. IF she wants me to spend more money on the cat, it is to put him down. Yeah, things are going to suck around my house the next few days.

I wonder if I should just leave the front door open, put the dog in the back room, and let the cat wander away, then say he got out past me and ran. Then hope he doesn't find his way home. Easy fix for me. But I don't think the Wife will buy it. Rusty better get well, or some Korean family is going to be eating a good dinner soon.

Damn, that was a bigoted remark. Glad to see I ain't losing it.

PeacE