One Of Us Ain't Smart ...

 I am a little tired this morning. Seems like I was up at least five (maybe more) times during the night to go to the potty. No sitting down, but the liquid drainage ... I don't get how sometimes the meds just like kick into overdrive and work. I peed. I peed again. And again, and again. And who knows how many times in all. I remember thinking during one episode of standing there, draining, that the sleep function on this smart ring is going to show my schedule as all mixed up being up so many times during the night. Nope. It says I had a 97% optimal night. On the visual graph, it does show some shifting from deep to light cycles that were frequent and close together. Maybe that was the bathroom trips? Either way, it says I slept good, but here I am feeling tired.

I think I mentioned in the past couple days that my calendar this week is pretty open. I only have a birthday on it, and my VFW Aux meeting. I do need to call Mayo here in a bit. Friday late in the day they sent a message through the portal, saying something about needing labs done ( I already did the 'monthly' recently) and I needed to schedule. Usually they just schedule them and I concur. So is this a tox screen (I'm about due this month) where generally they send me the Dr's orders, and I can go to a separate lab facility. I don't know. Replies weren't allowed to that message (idiots) so now I have to call. On a Monday morning. At 8am. Wonder how long I will be on hold ...

Today is Day 5 of no cigarettes. Most of the urge has gone. I did have a slight craving yesterday afternoon, as I felt like having one while taking a quick break from my video game I was playing. But easily distracted from the thoughts. Been coughing a bit more, with phlegm occasionally coming up. I am sure it is the lungs and esophagus getting rid of 'crap' from smoking. It should stop in a few days, according to what I read. It may be early, and I don't want to jinx myself, but I think I got this one beat now as well. 

RM is securing multiple lunch dates with me, it seems. If you read her blog, you'll know she is someone that loves to give. She will go out and buy it (within reason) if she knows you need/want it, just to bring a person some happiness. Sometimes it is stuff one never mentioned. Well, lately, I have been the recipient of some things. There was a 4-pack of shorts with a gym-type adjustable waist, that look like cargo shorts. I don't know why she got them (PT? But he didn't care for them?) but I said I would try them. They fit good, and are wonderful when I go in for my Paras. No suspenders/straps/belts to deal with. She always sends some veggies home with the Wife when she does her Farmer's market thing. Knowing I like to make pickles every now and then, Friday she gifted me a lid sealer for jars. Said she got two of them before asking me if I could use one. I had replied not really, but she already had it. I do have a few jars here, and I admit, I am sort of curious how well it works. So I asked how much it was - I don't know. So I said something like, it must be the price of a lunch date with me then. If so, that'd be like 2-3 lunches I owe her. Now it is just the matter of finding a day to do them.

Welp, it is 8am, and I need to call Mayo, so I am outta here...

PeacE

Doing It Differently ...

 When it comes to doing things, everyone has their own style. Many times, it is the same as 'everyone else' as it is the best way to accomplish what that goal is. Many times it is a 'forced change' to purposely create a new viewpoint/way of doing that same thing, done the same way, day after day. Yesterday's meeting at the Post is a prime example.

It was on my calendar as a District 3 Training Day. Usually, that has the Post members meeting in the hall, and the Aux. in the canteen. We'd do a 1-hour training on something specific: a recent change to a form, or maybe some protocol changes. Then move into our regular meetings for District. Somewhere down the line, it was decided to do Joint Trainings for the District. That is putting the Post and Aux. together, to train each other the programs we each do, areas where we could use the help of the other, etc. The first one started off with the Aux. explaining the Programs we are accountable for, and how the Post is able to assist, as well use the same event to complete some of their program requirements. Either way, I find myself liking this much more than the training before. We should be working hand-in-hand, and not 'fighting each other' over events, etc. Personally, I did not 'learn' much of anything, as most of the information was Aux. stuff, and I already was aware of it. Our meeting in January should be interesting, as it will be the Post doing the same for the Aux. Obviously, the hope is to create a more family environment, to stop any division/rift between the two VSOs. I like it.

Changes. Sometimes they are good ones, and sometimes not. I know personally, changes have seemed the only thing I have done since September. I became sober (10 months now!). medical issues have made changes to the body (good and bad), medications changes symptoms, decisions on lifestyles have changed. Having to have a transplant, doing the TIPs procedure, healthier and controlled diet - all these are ongoing and are good changes, once they happen. What are some other changes? There is a list of them. I think the ones that top the list as my favorites: 1) sobriety; 2) quit smoking (today is Day 4, and going strong!); 3) better, controlled diet; 4) rebuilding relationships I damaged with family and friends; 5) rebuilding a relationship with God. There are many more, and these few examples are not in order of favoritism, but just what popped into my head at the time.

Smoking. Whew! Day 4, and I am still going strong. The first day, I refused to leave the house - literally. The fear that I would be tempted to stop somewhere and buy another a pack was so big in my mind... Day 2 I felt a bit better, but that was Friday, and I had to go to the Post. Knowing where the smoking patio was made some temptation come up to bum a smoke from someone, but I busied myself in the kitchen, working on the dinner. Day 3, yesterday, had to be at the Post again, but this time there were no temptations of the smoking area. No desires to stop somewhere and get a pack. Have I picked up on some weird habits in this short time? Not really. I have been craving soda more, and picked some more up. It'll be at least another week or more before I start seeing some healthy changes of not smoking (breathing easier, less coughing, etc.). I am just keeping on doing the good things I know I can do, and that is that.

Friday night at dinner (RM & PT had come as usual) I was sort of not nice. I kept making jabs at PT about things I know he is sensitive about doing or discussing. I was talking more to RM than him (as usual) and was mentioning about the probability of giving up my car keys. The TIPS procedure could have an effect of increasing my encephalopathy, and one really shouldn't drive with this condition. You hear those Silver Alerts for people with dementia in their older age, and how they just drive off somewhere. This is similar. I was even mentioning about just giving up my keys now, though I really haven't had any episodes but one (Wife caught it). I would look over and say something like 'Even at my younger age I probably will be giving up my car keys so I don't hurt anyone'. It went completely over his head. No rection. I am not even sure he heard me. Another time I made a comment about an Old Folks table, and he hmm'ed/haw'ed saying something like he wasn't old. My goodness man! You're 89 years old! You ARE old. Another jab was about how he said he does like the Chair Tai Chi, and I said something like 'Isn't that hard to do from a reclining position in your easy chair with you eyes shut? He grumbled about that one. In short, I was mean, on purpose. I should apologize. I know I should. But I don't want to. Problems to take to God ...

And with that, I am getting off the ol' bloggo. Nothing on the calendar today, so figure I may be playing games all day - unless the Wife decides it is Honey-Do time. Ugh.

PeacE

Short and Sweet

 Not much to share today. I have a District 3 VFW training to attend to this morning at my Post. I am in the middle of making sure I have every thing I need to bring in my portable office. Even if I am only an Asst. Secretary to my Aux Post, I try to assist a little at the District meetings as well. For example, it is a small thing, but I provide a sign in sheet, properly titled for the type of meeting, and the date. Our own Secretary has mentioned to me that even just for our Post, this is so much better than just a blank sheet with names scrawled willy-nilly on it. A little organization, ya know?

This next week is pretty free of events. I do have a Para scheduled for Wednesday, and the regular Aux meeting on Tuesday evening ... and that is it. Oh, and my Step-Mom's birthday is Tuesday as well. Though she and I have had some 'bad times' between us back when I was about 12 and Dad had passed, she didn't stop me from leaving to go live with RM. As I became an adult and learned some of Life's lessons, she has never failed to let me (and my family) visit  my little sister. Our relationship has grown, as both of us overcame issues we have had, and I respect and admire her quite a bit. She has fought cancer, debilitating mental issues and extreme grief - most at the same time - so who wouldn't seeing someone that has overcame.

RM's birthday is next month, too. I have no clue as to what to get her. If I ask, I'm told nothing, or gift cards for Amazon. I know most people want to give a gift that has some meaning to relationship with that person, or that the birthday person is "into" like a hobby. She likes that diamond art. Wish I had a good picture of my family to have a kit made for her. I have a couple weeks before I have to have something, at least ordered. I know, she's going to say don't bother for her sake ... but c'mon! It's RM!

With that I need to sign-off, finish getting ready for my meeting/training.

PeacE

I'm Drawing A Blank ...

 My head is pretty empty this morning. I went through the morning routine, well, up to this point anyways. Did my vitals, did my meds, checked the ol' email box. Placed an order for pickup this afternoon for tonight. Aside from the Dinner tonight, I have nothing on my calendar for today.

Riders Dinner tonight. This will be our last monthly one, and we will move to Quarterly with the next being in October. We will bring back the Soup Night that has gone over well the last couple times we have done it. I am picking up some Southern style Potato salad, plus I already got the buns and BBQ sauces. 

Okay, I'm going to gripe a bit. I enjoy being a part of the VFW Riders (even though I do not personally ride a motorcycle). I have not minded (overly) being the Secretary for the past couple years (a thankless job no one wants), but I am getting kind of fed up and tired of the Chapter. No one attends meetings except about 7-8 of us; the same group that are getting burned out doing the dinners. Trying to put some kind of ride together is next to impossible. If we were to just tell the members 'this is what we're doing' they would follow like sheep, but to create something on their own, or even in a meeting - impossible it seems. Plus the changes coming down the line. Late July there is to be a vote that will brings the Riders into the group as a 'Sister' organization to the VFW and Auxiliary, rather than just a 'committee under the Post'. Which will be a Treasurer's and Secretary's nightmare of paperwork. From setting up bank accounts, EINs, 501(c), bond requirements, and on and on. There are some good aspects coming out of the deal though also. Officer positions are able to be held by non-Post members (like Aux) and they want to bring in a unified patch. Right ow we have a patch for the Post members, and a separate one for the Aux members. Anyway, enough on that for now ... I'm starting to get heated up. Save that rant for another time.

Welp, I have taken a bathroom break, and sat here for a bit pondering where to lead this train-wreck, and am not coming up with anything. Catch you on the Flipped Side!

PeacE

It's A Brand New Day ...

 Today starts a fresh round of Life. Well, at least that is how I am looking at it. I may share too much on here at times, but when it comes to my liver transplant, maybe someone else going through similar will take inspiration from my words - as if I had any readers.

Tuesday I met with the IR for a consult at Mayo. This was specifically to go over the TIPS procedure, the pros/cons of it. After discussion with the IR doctor, and a few questions, I opted to do the procedure. The Wife and I had talked about this back in November, to look at as possible assistance. Basically, it is a bypass to take the pressure of backed up blood flow that the liver cannot handle and redirect it. It is supposed to reduce, if not eliminate, the build-up of the ascites in the abdomen. In my support groups, I have heard some guys say it greatly decreased the number of times they had to do paracentesis and others said they didn't have to do any at all while they waited for their transplant. I'm not aiming high but I would truly like being able to not do a para every week. If I could get it to once a month or longer, it would be much easier to deal with. Either way, the TIPS stays in until the transplant. I have a CT of the Abdomen, then a couple days later the procedure. Oh, and finally scheduled the colonoscopy for late August (like you wanted to know that crap - see what I did there). Oh! And they drained 10L plus said there was still some fluid in there. Sigh.

Brand new day. Brand new start. It's Day One. I smoked the last cigarette I had last night. No longer are there any here at home, or in my car. All I need to do is not buy them. Today I have nothing on my calendar and told the Wife I was not going ANYWHERE today, to reduce the want to stop and get more. She says she has a couple prescriptions to be picked up. Sigh. I probably have yet another one to get as well. But I can use the drive-thru pick up versus going inside. Even if I went inside, I usually pay at the pharmacy, so do not even have to go to the front counter (and see cigarettes).

Friday is our last VFW Riders dinner for awhile. We voted to go quarterly now, as the same 6 or so people were the ones doing it all, all the time. We are getting burned out. So it will be shredded chicken or pork sandwich, Cole slaw, and I am thinking of getting a couple tubs of southern style potato salad. 

Last night as the Wife and I lay in bed doing our phone/tablet or whatevers, I turned to her and asked, I'm supposed to tell you if I am feeling things (in regards to medical especially). She said of course, so I did. I felt ... off. I know when I have a para done, that for a couple days at least I do go through an adjustment: organs adjusting to where they should be, feeling some fatigue and other tiredness, even sometimes a lack of desire to do anything that involves moving around. But this was different. It started early evening, and went through at least until I fell asleep. Still not sure what it was, but at least she knew about it in case something worse happened. I have got to get better at communicating when I do not feel right, or well. This morning I was up at 5:10a and as far as I can tell, feel normal. Whatever I felt last night is gone. I was going to be a bit worried if it persisted through a sleep cycle. 

Alrighty then. I think I over-shared too much today. Oh well. May it live forever on in the internet universe.

PeacE

Gonna Make 'Em Wait ....

 I know RM is probably waiting to hear how my IR consult went yesterday morning. Well, I will tell you, but not until later this afternoon. I have a paracentesis today at 1pm, and am just going to include all the information into one text versus spawning many more.

That being said, I have nothing of value to add for today. I'm off to read a little from this new book I bought.

Oh. And here is a song for y'all ...

PeacE

Short Stuff Today ...

 Today is Day One again. I think I know part of the problem. I have 8 cigarettes left in the last pack I have. I am going to move Day One to this weekend. I will finish this pack off, and just not buy any more. If it isn't available, I will be able to fight the urges better. 'Just throw them away' one would think, but I got some weird part of me that claims that would be a waste of money. I know, weird, right?

I have the Interventional Radiology consult this morning. It will be about the TIPPS procedure more than anything. I have mixed feelings about it, but at least right now, I am wanting it done. If it can reduce the number of times I have to have a paracentesis, I am all for it. I do not know if we will set a date to do the procedure, or what. Find out later this morning I guess.

Paracentesis scheduled for 1pm tomorrow. I need it. I feel about 8L or so to be drained.

I decided to compete this week with RM. I have several packages coming in over the next week. I did get a couple shirts I ordered already. And a wide mouse pad with Office/Excel/PowerPoint functions so maybe when I need one, I don't have to go hunting on Google. I know Joe gave me a tip on the Miss Excel email, and I have gotten a few things from those. Thanks again, Joe.

Entertainment and House meeting tonight. I did get the agenda out yesterday, as I worked on it first thing. Riders Dinner is Friday, then we are going to quarterly dinners. Pulled Pork/Chicken sandwiches and a side this week.

Supposed to have a Chapter ride on August 1st called 'Burn Your Buns'. It's basically a ride around the Valley on the 202 freeway system. And it will be hot. I know nothing else about it. I told them at the last meeting to get the info together. I'm a Secretary - I just note the stuff, not plan it.

Another of yesterday's packages was one of the books I ordered. "Demolishing Doubt" by Cliffe and Stuart Knechtle. It was the one that caught my eye when I was at the site. I was thinking it was more on self-doubts, but it is about doubts that affect our faith. It's about doubts we have of 'Is God real', is the Bible true? Kind of more for a starting Christian. But will still be an interesting read. And it is a hardback. And it smells new (yes I am weird, I smell books.

And I think that concludes this morning's focus. I am already off and thinking about the consult.

PeacE