I Gotta New Name

 Wednesday, the Youngest and I were going to do another highway/street trip to give him more practice driving. Trying to find purpose in these drives, I chose that we would go to White Castle (I been craving) way over on the east side of town (there's only 3 in the Valley). It's a good jaunt on the highway, then I was going to have him drive the 'streets' back home. Practice, right? Well, Middle Son came by that day, so we both agreed to put it off to the next day. Then yesterday, I woke with a really bad headache, and asked to push to Friday. That's later today, and as of now, I'm still ready.

So it was Thursday, and around 1pm my headache finally started its way of disappearing. The Youngest had plans to go to the HS football game with the girlfriend around 2-3pm, so I said I was going to head out. I went down to the VFW. I had a tablet, I had books, and they had iced tea. I spent a good part of the afternoon and evening there, then headed towards home. One of my regular spots was on the way, so I stopped. My tablet was under 50% battery power, so I didn't even take it inside to try to read.

I got a spot at the bar, ordered my usual, and was just kinda watching sports recaps and whatnot on the television. Someone stops by and says the usual, "Hi. I'm (name)." I respond in kind, "I'm Ralph. How ya doing?" Almost immediately I get this blank look, then they say they have to go over to whatever table with their friends. Weird.

A little time goes by, and someone else stops by me, ordering a drink, and make small talk, I say, "Hey, how ya doing?". They are cool, and respond back they are well. I put out my hand, saying, "I'm Ralph. And you?". The blank look again. I'm trying to figure out what the heck is going on...

At this point, someone I know actually comes in, comes down and sits next to me, and I'm thinking this is good. He and I talk for awhile, just regular guy chit-chat, and talking about sports recaps, etc. A gal come walking up next to me, to order drinks for her table, and again, I offer up a hi, how are you. I get an enthusiastic answer about the good time she is having, so I ask her name. It's Cindy (spelling I don't know). I say I'm Ralph. Again that blank look. She quickly carts the drinks back to her friends, and coming back for the final one, I asked her, "What is going wrong? You are the third person to meet me tonight, and everyone gets this blank look, then goes away". She does the whole over-the-shoulder looking thing, then tells me that there is a "saying", or "rumor", that if you bother Ralph the Reader, it can get ugly. I mention that I am probably the guy, as I know the bartenders tend to tell people to leave me alone when I reading, but I didn't have my book with me that night. Her words... her words... if you mess with Ralph the Reader, and you bother him, he will hurt you.

Sorry RM, but OMFG. Really? You interrupt my reading, I'll hurt you? I mean, if you can't have a decent convo, after interrupting my reading, yeah, I'm not going to be happy. And I will verbally blast you until you leave me alone and run to the other side of the world. But physically hurt someone? Wow.

So, if you are ever in the north side of the Valley, in my 'stomping grounds', watch out. Don't interrupt the fat guy reading at the bar.

On a side note, the Wife got me a 'loaded baked potato salad' from the grocery a couple days ago. It was marked down for clearance sale. I checked the date about 15 minutes ago, it was for 9/14 for best sale. It smelled okay, so I just ate it. Not a fan - too much sour cream for my taste. Just letting someone know in case I die tomorrow from toxins.

PeacE