I have started recently to do a 'quiet time' for reflection, meditation, and time with God. Why? Well, because I see others doing, or claiming to, it and how much it helps them. RM has been doing her morning time with God for years now, and I think that is what pushed me into doing something of the same. I haven't done Discipleship training. I don't have a daily devotional to study a passage of the Bible each day. Right now I read a chapter (they're short) in this book RM recommended, followed with bringing my Bible out. Most days I am turn about reading the Bible. I have argued with myself that the best place to start is at the beginning. But part of me rebels, and would prefer a more methodical, devotional, teaching way of doing this. So I would just randomly open it up, and read some of the passages from that page and maybe a page or two further. Do I always make sense of it? Not a chance! Sometimes do I get 'lucky'? Sure! Even a blind squirrel is able to find a nut every now and then.
This morning I decided I would focus on reading a book of the bible. Doesn't matter how much of a chapter(s) I read, but that I do it. I decided on Psalms. In the process of finding and placing my Faith, I thought this might be a good starting spot to learn how to lift God up, share his praises, and still learn. As I started this morning, I felt better - more focused, more in-tune with what I was reading, able to apply myself to it better (I think). Then lastly comes Prayer.
Is there a perfect outline/formula for prayer? If there is, I don't know of it. I give praise, for what I have seen and what I have not seen. I ask for guidance to do His will. I ask for forgiveness for my wrongdoings, and the help to "forget" them when given up. That one is hard. Relinquishing control over things is just hard for me. I think it is a carry-over from when I was a narcissist (my drinking days) of having/keeping control.
Somewhere in all this, I started texting RM each morning. I toss out a GM!, a daily affirmation, or positive vibe, and an I love you Mom! It's good I stay in touch better. Especially when I have questions of a spiritual nature, RM is near at hand. Plus, I think she likes the attention (smirk).
Went to a birthday party for a good friend yesterday and even the Wife went with me (finally talked her into it). Tons of food! Smoked brisket, shredded pork, chicken, ribs... and that was just the meat! we ate, and visited briefly one on one with the Hosts. After a couple hours, both of us were ready to go. There was just too many people. Every room was crowded and standing room only, plus between the heat, and something I had ate, was making me nauseous. The Wife's social meter was buried in the red she told me on the way home ... where I did get sick, but felt better after. My Brother and SIL were there, so I visited a bit with him. We haven't seen each other in a while, so he caught me up on his kids' issues, and about the granddaughter living with them. Then actually asked about how I was doing, so I shared where I was at with my medical. I may need to use him for a colonoscopy appt. later this month, if the Youngest doesn't make it back from his trip in time. We briefly talked about phone habits - he prefers calling people to update them on things, and just talk. I hate talking on the phone. You have me on the phone, it's going to be short, with info that I needed quickly. Otherwise text me, and I'll get back you in some form. So my Brother tells my Sister he doesn't talk to me because I am mean on the phone. Eyeroll. What made him think that? (Duh!)
After I finish this it is a work day. I need to do the Riders minutes, and the Agenda for the House Comm. I did hear last night, unofficially still, that the Riders did have a positive vote to become a separate entity/sister organization to the VFW. Still nothing from leadership at the State or National level have sent anything to me. The website does not reflect any changes. I know it was just last weekend, but still. Sigh what can ya do?
With that I am out of here!
PeacE
