Where Are All The Good Drugs?

 The past two weeks have been pure 'pain in my ass', as you would know if you read the past few posts I've put up. After the wasted (and expensive) trip to the ER, it seems like painful issue after painful issue has been happening to my body, with no relief seeming to be in sight. I have been trying to stay off my feet, to hopefully let this knee issue resolve itself. Because with the knee hurting, it has thrown off my gait, which has now messed with my back, complicating the previous work comp injury, so my spinal disc has started to slip, rubbing the nerve. I thought Friday I had rested up off the knee enough, but evidently was on it too much last night. Today was bad enough I was taking acetaminophen every four hours, with seemingly no results. Wish I had something stronger, or even some muscle relaxers like the Doc gave me when I had the injury. They helped at night to get to sleep.

Well, life has been pretty dull other than dealing with these pain issues. Heard from the Company mid-week, after I had emailed inquiring if there were any projects I could be assigned to. Supposedly, there were "several projects coming up at the end of the week" and I was "at the top of the list to get assigned" but of course, here it is early Sunday morning, and I have not heard a word since. Hoping to get that email early Monday morning (since the 'Assigners' are on East Coast time) that they have something. If not, another email will go out when I rise from bed.

Well, RM would be proud. With all the issues I been having, I have decreased my alcohol intake by quite a margin. Not drinking as much, or as often, which is nice on the pocketbook of course. I went near a week after the ER with no drinking at all, then eased back into it. I think I am still trying to be sure the original issue wasn't related to the drinking, and I truly don't believe it was.

The big 5-0 birthday is coming up soon... just over a week away. Looks like I may get all my kids together on Labor Day to have supper out to celebrate. Still waiting to hear from Oldest Son to confirm, but he had sent me his work schedule and he was off in the evening. Hope that don't change. Haven't thought much about any gift I would want from anyone. I'll have a night out at some of the pubs I hang at, and get some free drinks from those folks. I know RM had said she had something for me, and she knows how I am not big about gifts, so I am curious about it would be. I'm guessing the Wife will get me some snacks I like. If I can get all my kids together for dinner, I think that would be the best gift I want. Was able to do it last year, so hoping it will work out this year as well.

The Daughter is turning 30 late in the month as well. I have been looking for a good 'gag gift' to tease her, but haven't found the right thing yet. Need to soon or it won't have shipping time to get here. Hard to believe my oldest is nearing 30 already... the Youngest is 15. Sigh. Time marches on ....

Alright, enough ramblin' on this morning.

PeacE

'Round 'n 'Round it Goes, When Will it Stop....?

 Tuesday late afternoon, the knee was feeling a bit better. I decided to go hang out with some friends for a bit. We went to a pub I hadn't been to in a few days - not our regular place, but near it. We had only been there about an hour, when I figured out how I hurt the knee.

I had headed to the restroom (desire was string after 3 pitchers of water - yes, I was not drinking any alcohol) and pushed open the men's room door. At this locale, the restroom door is a hard open, and has what I call a stiff spring on the door, meaning the spring-action that shuts the door automatically, is too tight, and requires more force to open/close, and it shuts harder than average. Well, as I pushed it open, balanced as I was on my legs and cane, the door came swinging shut before I was fully through the door. By bumping my side, it threw me a little off balance, causing me to twist the right leg (at the knee) just a little. This time it twinged with pain, that I did a no-no. I recalled being at this pub the night before I noticed all this new knee pain. That evening, though I now knew to expect this when opening the door, it still happened twice more. I'm pretty sure this is how I hurt the knee. So, in a way, that is good to know.

Wednesday goes fine. Still resting and off the legs/feet as much as possible to help speed up the knee recovery. No side pains, or anything else to note. We decided to go to a local pizza place for dinner as 25% of all meals bought were being donated to the HS Band where the Youngest is attending (and is in the band). AS I went to get into my vehicle to leave, I felt like I had literally sat on my testicles. Quickly I jumped out of the seat, and kind of grabbed the 'boys' and was thinking to myself 'WTH?' I slowly lowered myself back into the seat, and still just felt the discomfort, as you guys know, of being knocked in the nards. It faded as we drove and had dinner. Though when we went to leave the pizza place, it flared again as I sat in my seat, though I was being cautious about how I lowered myself into the car.

Once we got home, I shifted out of my clothes into some gym shorts to go sit in front of the computer. As I lowered into the office chair, again that pain, though now I am also feeling some back pain near the spine on the left side. I go to bed, and certain movements shifting from side to side, getting into/out of bed, etc, caused these pains to flare. So like most morons, I google my symptoms. I read probably about twenty entries from cancer to clogged veins, but never had the same symptoms, until I get to the very bottom of one page. Lower back pain, and pain in the groin/lower abdomen - caused more than likely from the spinal nerve being pinched in the lumbar section. 

My work comp injury from about 4-5 years ago - slippage of the L4 or L5 disc, causing distress to the spinal nerve. My knee hurting and causing me to "change" my gait, causing muscles to work differently, thus causing my back pain. Great. Things just seem to multiply around me these past two weeks. My guess is if I can "heal" up the knee pain, stay off of it, etc, things should shift back into the normal range for me. Hopefully before my birthday coming up.

Sigh. Feels like a lot to wish for....

PeacE

The Fun of Self-Diagnosis

 Well, there really isn't any fun in it at all. Trying to guess why your toe hurts and how it is connected to the hair-loss you have on the back of your head, is somehow comical, but mostly it is weird ... and scary. But that is what I talked about with the Wife tonight. I brought up how my 'good' knee has been pretty painful the past few days, though being off of it has helped a little. I also mentioned the lower back pain that has been starting up, an actual flaring up of my work comp injury. I'm pretty sure it has to do with my knee. Having the knee hurt as mush, I've adjusted my step/gait, and I am confident that that is what is causing my back to flare from making muscle adjustments it is not used to, and it is shifting my spine a bit. Which is also close to where I am feeling some "pulling" when laying on my right side ... all could be muscle related. So what am I going to do about it? Rest. Stay off my feet for the next few days as much as possible. Do a few of the PT exercises for my back that were beneficial when I was injured. I figure that is about all I can do at this point.

I hate feeling like I have the past week plus. I'm used to "little" aches and pains, that go away after a few days. Not these things that make you want to cut the hurt out with a knife and stab it to death. I'm sure it is just age and the body falling apart on me, since I have not been the best caretaker of this flesh. I know, I know ... I sound like a whiny baby, and I am sure I am being one. Just so tired of this.

Speaking of tired, my sleep schedule is all messed up again. Trying to rest as much as possible has led to extra naps, so sleeping all night has been off the table for at least the last three nights. Today I was in bed before ten, now just after one I am up again. Hopefully in a couple hours I will be able to lay down and get a few more short hours in.

Right now my life is pretty boring, so don't be surprised if I don't write much.

PeacE

Is Something Wrong, or Am I Just Broken?

 So, the ER trip a week ago. Each day since, the "stabs" of pain in my side, especially when taking breaths, has gradually subsided to almost non-existent. This morning as I draw a deep breath, as much as I can, I still feel some twinges, but not painful. It's almost like it never happened. But new things crop up to take the place of that pain.

My knees have ever been a problem for me. With the stress I have put them through playing ball, and the numerous bicycle accidents as a kid, it's amazing it isn't just scar tissue that holds them together. Being overweight doesn't help them either. I get around using a cane most days, mostly to keep myself stabilized, as my left knee likes to "fold" without notice sometimes. But in the past three days, my right knee has been showing some pain. Feels like I have "banged" the inside of the knee against something and bruised it. Yet I haven't hit my knee. There is no discoloration, but when walking now, it makes me wonder which side should I use the cane for. With just a little bit of walking around the house this morning, it feels better than yesterday, and again today I will be off my feet as much as possible.

Also noticed yesterday was my right side again. I favor to lay on my right side to sleep, and most of this last week I have not been able to, due to the pain I was having. Yesterday morning, as I woke and sort of laid in bed, I felt like something was being 'pulled apart' just behind where the previous pain had been. It decreased as I rolled to my back, and disappeared when rolled on over to my left side. IT wasn't painful, just very uncomfortable. Add to that that I felt fuzzy headed most of the day, and took frequent naps. This morning I woke way early due to all that sleeping, and still having the new side issue. 

So that's where I am today. Nothing heard about a new project for work. Side pain. Knee pain. I think I may be spending much of the day in bed again, resting and napping.

PeacE

A Memory That Came Up

 My First Time at a Bar

Let's preface this a bit. I would have been about 10'ish in age. Parents were separated, if not divorced by this time. I lived with my Father. Dad worked about 30-45 minutes away from where we lived. I was alone  many times: before/after school, school breaks, etc. I had things to keep me busy during those times. I had chores. I also raised rabbits in the 4-H program. Household stuff, too, since it was just Dad and I. I got an allowance, as well.

So, I think it was during the summer of my 10th year. I'm guessing, but it 'rings right' in mymemory, which somehow showed up today.

I had finished the chores of the day I needed to do. School was not in session, so I was pretty much free to do whatever. Kirklin is a small farm community, or at least that is the way I remember it. People know everyone, blah, blah. I had saved up my allowance and probably had about $20 in ones and change. I decided to "go out on the town".

Now Kirklin then was small. Had the one blinker in town, flashed green for 421 (the Michigan Road) and yellow for State Routes 38/39 (combined through town). That was a 24/7 light. One of those 'blink you missed it' type towns. But they had a few amenities.

That day I walked the few short blocks up to the Rexall Drugstore (on the corner - and they used to do the shakes there too) bought some penny candies, and stepped back outside. I was about 10 (stated before) and was pretty familiar with the layout of town, but maybe not all businesses. The General Store (Hanson's) held nothing for me. Though, I remember back in the day getting butcher cuts (I think?). Coming out of the Rexall, I decided, I was old enough, and a man, like my dad, I was going to the bar. Yes, there was one there in that small town.

I don't recall the name of the place, yet I can probably point it out where it would have been if we drove through town today. The building is long gone. It was one of them old ones, from years before my time, that had to be taken down to either make room for something new, or just to keep from hurting anyone, I'm sure.

I walked in and with the confidence of my 10-year-old self, climbed up on a barstool in the middle of the bar. There were a couple "old farmers" down the way from me, but I didn't care. The female bartender, with a smile on her face, asks me "What will it be?".

"I need a beer. My Dad has one to relax every now and then, and I think I been doing a good day's work, that I could use one about now," I replied.

"Do you have a preference?" she asked.

I had no clue, so I said "Whatever the special is."

She walked away, to get my 'special' and I looked over at the two older guys at the end of the bar, who were giggling. No idea why they were, but they weren't making me look bad. The bartender comes back with a brown bottle, pops the top, and sets in it front of me. I nod.

"That'll be a buck," she says. I lean to my side, pull my "wad" out of my pocket, pull a dollar off, stuff the rest back in, and slap in on the counter. She smiles at me, and takes it, ringing it up as a sale. I take a sip, and ohhhhh... that's some good root beer! No wonder Dad likes to have one every now and then. This one tastes colder than any we bought and put in the fridge!

The bartender comes back and start talking to me. "So, who's your daddy? Do I know him?"

"I'm sure you do. His name is *** and he was a cop here in town til not too long ago." I say as I take another drink.

She doesn't say anything, and gets a weird look on her face. Them two older gents quiet down, their laughter going away.

"Oh, really," she says. "And does he know you are up here?"

I looked her dead in the eye, and said, "No, Ma'am. In our house we raise men that don't blab about stuff that don't need to be talked about. I'm taking a break having this beer. What's that got to do about my Dad?"

She guffawed. Might have been the first guffaw I ever known about. And them two older men, they was damn spittin' up their own drinks. By this time I was pretty close to finishing the bottle, and was scowling, because I didn't understand the humor that everyone else was having, at my expense. I drank down the last it that was left, and jumped down from the barstool.

"Ya know, most people leave a tip for the server," the bartender said to me. So I reached into my pocket, feeling the prolly $2.50 in pennies I had in there, and grabbed a small handful. I pulled it out and put it on the bar. 

"There ya go. Have a good 'un," I said and walked out the door. I dunno I gave her fifty cents, or more. I know it weren't a dollar, because I didn't use a full handful. And I heard laughter from all three as I walked out the door.

Later that evening, after Dad and I had fixed dinner and were eating, Dad asks, "How was your first beer?"

I froze. How'd he know I was at the bar? How'd he know I ordered a beer? HOW???

"Tasted like a good A&W. No wonder you like to have one every now and then," I said. Dad was smiling. He chewed his bite of food, then set his fork down.

"Don't ever go to the bar again without me," he said. "And whatever you do, never ask for the special. If you want a beer, you can ask me anytime."

That truly was the last time I was in a bar, until my teenage years. But by then, I was more 'world-wise' and wasn't there for a drink, but to collect on a newspaper delivery tab. I never got to 'share' a beer with my Dad, as he passed away enough years before I was of age. But I think back to that small-town community thinking...where everyone knows everybody, and every says whatever. I know that is how my dad knew about that day, and when I mentioned his name, they knew if they did something wrong, he'd hear about it too. Least, that's what I figure.

** That memory popped up tonight while I was out with a buddy at the pub. I don't know what triggered it, but I was glad it did. It is one I am saving back in notes, but I felt like sharing.

PeacE

Dying A Little Inside Everyday

 The pain is still there, but once more has lessened in its intensity. I prodded the side, and had to poke moderately to feel some pain. Still feeling a spike when I take a deep breathe. Overall though, less than yesterday, so hopefully by the weekend will be pretty much gone.

Went out to the pub again last night. This sitting around the house doing "nothing" has been really bothering me lately. I admit, I didn't drink any soda. The night before I had so much, it took until about 4am to get to sleep (sugar and caffeine I am sure). So I switched it up to water, and slowed down the intake so I wouldn't be having to use the facilities every 20 minutes. After having a few pitchers, I decided I was going to have a couple drinks, and see how I felt today. Success! Hydrating and very low alcohol intake seems to not bother my side, so that's good to know.

My buddy I spoke about yesterday is supposed to get his test results today. I am sure he will want to get out for a couple beers if he is negative - after being stuck at home the last week plus. Got an update on another older friend yesterday as well. He had had a stroke (3rd, maybe 4th) about 3 weeks ago. He has been in a rehab/hospice setting since. The girlfriend won't let him come back to her home, due to him having a couple psychotic episodes (controlled back down with meds) which worries/scares her. But she is working with the VA and State to get him someplace (he can't live on his own). I guess they are talking about putting him in LTC for a short term, before getting him into a place where he will be able to interact with others in common places, etc. Heck of a thing for one of our veterans.

The Wife just left to go "shopping". Great. She says it some new place she heard of that does discount pricing on stuff. Like Fridays items are $5, Saturday they got o $4, and so on down to Thursday ($.50) but she has no idea of the quality or even what they have as it changes weekly. I wonder how much junk she gonna bring home that we don't need. Sigh. Trade-offs.

Though I slept in this morning, I think I may be taking an afternoon nap. For now though, I'll eave you here as I go off and read some other stuff.

PEacE

Shocking the World (and myself)

 I haven't had a beer, or any alcohol, since last Friday. WHAT?!? Yeah. When that pain started Friday, though it felt minor, I thought it might be somewhat caused from dehydration. I get cramps in the legs when I don't drink enough regular fluids, so thought I should spend some time hydrating. Come Sunday, when the pain started to worsen (though not terrible as of yet) I was still drinking plenty of water. Then of course, early Monday happened, leading to spending the day at the ER.

I know those of you that know me are shocked I have been able to go that many days without some sort of alcohol, and I don't care. I went to the bar today. I was up there a few hours, hanging out with a friend, did some reading of books. Drank WAY too many pitchers of Pepsi. YEs. Pepsi. No beer, no shots, no fancy umbrella drinks with alcohol. Straight-up Pepsi and ice. When I mentioned mid-afternoon to the Wife that I was "Heading out for a bit" (code phrase for 'I am going to the bar') she wasn't happy, and replied something under her breath about whatever, it's my liver. Obviously, with this issue going on, she was not thrilled about me  going out drinking. When I came home this evening, it was later (like I had been drinking) and I pretty much went to bed. She had not said one thing to me. When she came to bed, I told her that I hadn't drank anything but Pepsi, and she was a bit shocked (like I know you were). At least she dropped her pissy attitude at me.

As the day wore on, I don't know if was me, or the body, getting used to the pain, but it seemed to decrease in intensity. Still cannot inhale deep without a spike of pain, and prodding that area I am notified there is still tenderness (or something). I will wait until later in the morning (hopefully after a few hours of sleep) to see if there less pain. If it decreases, I don't think I am going to call any GI. I didn't call today, but will Tuesday to set up this new doctor to see for HBP meds. I kinda want to wait to see if this pain fades over the next couple days, but if that happens, I know I won't call. Need to force myself to do it.

Other than that, nothing planned for the day. I mentioned previously that the work project ended, and I am currently on hold until the next project comes along. I'll give them a couple days before I start emailing them about how "available" I am to be placed on something. Hopefully that will work better than waiting 2-3 weeks until they get around to me. Squeaky wheel gets the grease, and all.

Last Thursday, I heard from a friend that his wife and MIL had Covid. The MIL was in the hospital - her condition wasn't terrible, but enough to warrant it. His wife was at home, and I think only got tested because she had been around her mother. So my Friend had to get tested (I'm sure work required it) and Friday found out he was positive, though no outward symptoms. Tomorrow he is getting tested again, and hoping it comes up negative. Then yesterday I heard another friend and his wife (about 15 years older than me) were both in the hospital for low oxygen levels and difficulty breathing. I reached out to him and found out it was Covid, and as of now they were going to be in for at least 2-3 weeks. I know news reports about the Valley stating that around 2,000 cases being reported daily, and deaths in the lower double digits. I don't understand all that crap, and how they jade the numbers to fit whatever media mumbo-jumbo and party they follow. I still believe that this hype is so politically controlled, whether for or against. If you got it, you got it. Like a cold, or the flu, or pneumonia. It gets worse or it don't. Mask mandates - Bah! Vaccination requirements - Bah! I'm sure for some of you, this will make you want to thump your chest in agreement, or start up the riot act against me. I don't care. This is my opinion, my blog. I respect your opinions/beliefs no matter how different (and stupid) they are compared to mine.

Okay, enough ranting. I should go back and delete some of that, but I won't. Writing is writing. And I am rambling because I want to get tired to go to bed. I think drinking all that soda tonight has given my body way too much sugar, and that is what is keeping me awake. Definitely more than I usually have all at one period of time. So, I guess I should leave off there, and maybe go find something else to do for a bit.

PeacE