Thursday, November 26

Turkey Day

Happy Thanksgiving Day to you readers! May your day be filled with good times, memories, and all that good stuff.

I am sitting at home alone today. All by choice. No, I am not boycotting the holiday, I am just sick. Yesterday, a head cold/sinus infection leapt upon me. By last night, I was wanting to crawl up and just not exist. This morning, I feel a very small fraction better, but now I ache (where I wasn't aching before) and still am clogged up, pressure build, etc. I guess the family will be heading to up north without me today... no sense in getting everyone else sick too.

I'll have to beg them to bring me back turkey.... my most favorite meal of the year. And I am sick.

Not a happy camper here today folks.

Ok, back to bed for now. Just took my pill.


Sunday, November 22

Life is going on....

So it was a week that I care not to repeat. Though, knowing how things go around here, it will at some point in time.

The daughter and I are at least back on speaking terms. I sat down the other night and let her know what I thought about the whole thing. Told her basically I was tired of it all; it wasn't worth having a heart attack over; and that if she didn't start acting her age and responsibility level, something else was going to have to be done. I guess it helped.

Other than that, we are prepping to go into the Christmas shopping season. Thanksgiving will be spent up at my Bro-In-Law's place in Payson. I am making dessert. I have to make double, as my side of the family has already requested it too, though we won't be eating with them.

Be putting in a new garbage disposal tomorrow. Yee haw.

That's it for now.


Tuesday, November 17

dot dot dot

It's been awhile. I almost missed being here. I say almost, because, for once in my life, I was doing the right thing. The 'right thing' as I see it is spending the time I have with my family. Yes, I can see many of you agree, it is a great and noble thing to do. Why waste your time here, when you have those things to do....

Which brings me back to here.... it feels like home.

In the last month, and maybe some more days than that, I have devote myself back to the family unit. Back to being more in the daily life of my children than I had been before. Trying my best to be more of a father than I had been before. Sounds pathetic, in a sense doesn't it? Why would I have to be more of one, if I was a good one before?

Simple answer. I wasn't/weren't/ain't the good father I thought I was....

No. None of the children are in welfare. None are in danger in our home. None are beaten senseless in drunken rages, or abused in physical way. And as I see it, none are verbally abused either....

Best place to start, they always say, is at the beginning...... I like to drink.

You'd think drinking is bad enough, but that is what I do... now. And even that is being controlled by me. How much you can trust an alcoholic? Well, my Wife trusts me. That trust has done wonders.

But, that's not the home problem. It's about growing old. Or for some, growing older.

I am a 38 year old male, who loves his High School Sweetheart, (whom I married) and we have had 4 WONDERFUL children together. My extremely talented daughter (18) and the three boys (11,7, 4). That's if I got their ages all correct. I am not a stickler for that.

Last night, there was an altercation. Mom and the daughter were in another room, and the all I heard was the daughter 'sassing back' to her mother. Strictly my interpretation of it. So I verbally broke in, and told daughter to not speak to her mother that way.

From there, it went to hell.

I have an 18 year old daughter telling both her parents to "fuck off" (yes Reverend Mother, exact words of your 'Princess') and not listening to anything. It's all about her. Let the police show up and take everyone to jail, because she can be out of this house.

Gotta love that. In fact, it sounds so good, I should have a PBR in my hand, and live in Kentucky!

Needless to say, the Wife and I are at wits end. The Daughter graduates in June, and is going to U of A in Tucson. We have told her for years, she gets R&B there, plus whatever else we can help pay over what grants/scholarships she gets.

It's all true. But to me it ain't right. The Daughter still has what they call here, 'Early Hour' band practices. So, she still needs to be driven to school early, before regular hours. This week, the Wife has vacation - one of those job things. Use it or lose it. This is her week she took to get it used.

So, after last night's 'fiasco', I awake and find a letter from the daughter. After reading it, I assume it is an apology from the 'fit' she had the night before. No, it is a letter placing blame on every family member for her problems, and total blame on me, for how she has become a failure in life.

The letter stated that *I* did not: support her choir concerts, her band concerts, the marching band activities, the theatrical plays, the class plays, in short... everything she has extracurricular in HS. True, I have not been to all of them. And the important ones, like the seniors walk at last home game.... she verbally said she did not want me to walk with her.

If this don't sound like a bad 'redneck' family, you tell me!

Tonight... I went to a bar. I drank. More than I have in over a month. I waited purposefully, before coming home. I wanted all the kids in bed. I said ALL.Especially the daughter, tonight. I asked my loving Wife, if the daughter and her had talked about the 'letter'. No.


I don't know how ot phrase it, but I have had the WORST kind of things happen in my life, been presented with the WORST sort of situations, and SUFFERED the consequences of my actions.... but this instance with the Daughter... I am at a loss.

I gave up on Christ years ago. I gave up on believing in family about the same time. My self belief - heh, I question it at the most important times. My Wife, who has been there through it all, has been the one thing I don't question.

So, what do I do?


I ain't really asking for no one's opinions..... just getting shit off my chest I guess.

Like the song says... 'God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy".

Good luck to the fucker that can figure my life out. Call me if ya do.


Sunday, November 8

Been busy!

The last few days I have actually been sorta busy. That's my official excuse anyways.

The Daughter had Senior Recognition night on Friday. Which turned into the last home game of the season. And a loss of who knows what. I left after halftime, and the score was 48-7. Saturday, the band has State marching competition. They placed an Excellent with a caption for percussion. Unfortunately, they will not be going further - so marching season is basically done now.

Had a nice evening with the family last night. We sat down and watched GI Joe. Wasn't the greatest movie, wasn't the worst. Wasn't too bad coming form a toy/cartoon beginning.

Thinking about heading to the pub today to watch the race with some friends.


Tuesday, November 3

UPdate with pics

So, I went to the dentist this morning. Seems the one tooth he had rebuilt 3/4 of the way is in ned of a root canal. Either that or pull it. Due to it's position (all the way in the back) he would need to refer me out to a specialist to have it done. Or I could have it removed. Then that side of my mouth would look like a jack o'lantern. I need to decide what to do and get it done as soon as I can. He was nice enough to give me a 'script for the pain at least.

Here are some pics from Halloween.

This is my youngest. He looks so cute in his fireman/truck outfit!

This is him l at the door of the real firetruck that was at the place they went.

All three boys decked out.


Monday, November 2

A Weak Relapse

Gee. I hadn't realized it had been a week since I last updated. You'd think I would notice these things more, but I don't. What's happened in that week? I mean, besides all the hoopla about the N1H1 (or whatever numbers and letters) vaccine and other BS from the Gov't.....

I was sick. Yep. Arizona had a nice little cool down last week where it dropped to 60's during the day (one day prior being in the 90's). The wind had kicked up bad for the whole day before the temp drop, and I think between allergies and the common cold, I caught it. The cold that is. I was out about Thursday through the weekend. I am feeling much better now though.

The daughter had a marching band competition Saturday and received an 'Excellent' rating, but no captions. Tonight the HS district had all 9 HS bands perform their shows for free. It was a nice family night to watch them all play and brings back memories of my high school days. This coming Saturday she has State Competitions going on. I need to find out where to see if we are going to attend or not. If they place high there, the following weekend may send them going the big game representing Arizona.

And see... that's about all that happened. Oh yeah. Exciting.

Tomorrow morning, I once again return to the dentist chair. I have been having some pain near where the last bit of dental work had been done. I shrugged it off as residual pain - I mean, I had had 2 root canals and a tooth rebuilt plus 2 visits for 'planing and scaling' my teeth all within like 5 weeks of each other. I figured it was my mouth adjusting to sore gums (and would lessen as they healed) and the teeth being a bit more temperature sensitive. But after the last week living on ibuprofen every chance I get, and waking up with a major pain at early hours of the morning.... no. So tomorrow the dentist gets to play exploratory dentistry as he dives in to find out what the problem is. I am hoping it is just a bad cavity and easily fixed.

That's it for now. Try to post some Halloween pics of the boys tomorrow.