Where the hell is everyone?

It's been quiet today in the office. I know because I am here. But where everyone else is I have no flipping clue. I know earlier several people were helping the bosses load up their trucks with miscellaneous computers, supplies, etc to take over to our new office. Then it got quiet. I walked around and there are only three people here including me. Needless to say, I have taken opportunity of the moment and slacked off at my desk ... not that I was busy anyways.

Well, I feel pretty talked out now. You can tell how exciting life is around me at the present. I need to get out more, or something. In the meantime, here is some more humor for your enjoyment. Maybe I will back with content later.

"Hello, Boss Rod? This is Philemon, the gardener at your country estate. I have been trying for to speak with you for many days."

"Ah yes, Philemon. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"

"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Mister Rod, that your parrot died."

"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the National competition?"

"Yes Boss, that's is the one."

"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?"

"From eating rotten meat, Mister Rod"

"Rotten meat? Who in this world fed him rotten meat?"

"Nobody, Boss. He ate the meat of the dead horse."

"Dead horse? What dead horse?"

"The thoroughbred, Mister Rod."

"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"

"Yes Boss Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart."
"Are you insane? What water cart?"

"The one we used to put out the fire, Boss"

"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"

"The one at your house, Boss! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire." "What the!!?? Are you saying that my house is destroyed because of a candle??!!”

"Yes Boss Rod."

"But there's electricity at the house!!! What was the candle for?"

"For the funeral, Mister Rod."

"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL?"

"Of your madam wife, Boss Rod... She showed up one night without telling anyone she was coming and I thought she was a robber, so I hit her with Boss's new Tiger Woods Limited Edition Nike Driver."

SILENCE...
LONG SILENCE...
FINALLY...

"Philemon, if you broke that driver, you're in deep, deep shit!"

PeacE